Walt Disney’s Sin City

Posted on September 21st, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, Humor.

CLICK HERE for original site.

Curt Rapala has put together a series of six images that’s a mashup of the original promotional posters for Sin City, with various females from Walt Disney in the roles.  This is simply brilliant.  It’s just Curt’s idea… there’s no plans for a movie and I’m fairly sure that Walt Disney would never green light such a killer idea. Now, if some pirates want to create it.. then all bets are off.

0 comments.

Random Thoughts - Election’s Impact On Entertainment

Posted on September 17th, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, Soap Box, Humor.

Today, it dawned on me how ironic it is that it’s Obama that spouts on and on about ‘change’, but it’s actually the McCain/Palin bill that had the fuel for Tina Fey to change Saturday Night Live into the funny show that it once was.

0 comments.

Washing Away Adulthood… At Least For A Little While

Posted on September 9th, 2008 by William.
Categories: General.

Sunday evening, I managed to get my butt outta the well used butt-rut in the couch and went out for a late night five mile walk.  Although the sensor in my Nike + shoes had a dead battery, so I was unable to track my distance with my iPod, I continued on my journey.

Tuesday night, I decided to do it again, but starting closer to midnight instead of the 2:30am of the previous night.  I stepped outside and Vader was excited to go outside, but by the end of the driveway, he had already forgotten the mission and had laid down under the rear bumper of my GTI.  Ahh, a gear head cat that’s attracted to the scent of gasoline.  Within a few yards, his plan to lay on under the car made a lot of sense as I felt the first of many raindrops.  I was already far enough that I didn’t want to turn around and get a hat.  Since I didn’t have any iPod with me, I continued to walk as the light sprinkles turned into a gentle rain.

The midnight calm allowed the sound of the raindrops to carry through the cool air and it was nice as my adulthood slowly washed away and I felt like a child playing in a gigantic sprinkler. Soon, I was letting my inner ‘mud turtle’ out as I was seeking out puddles to splash in.  As the miles slowly added up, it also occured to me that drenched denim is MUCH heavier than dry jeans and that extra force required for each step was starting to add up.  There’s wasn’t much to do other than to put one foot in front of the other, then repeat as necessary.  My front porch light was looking pretty good as I got closer to home, and it became time to get back to being an adult again.  Vader came out to walk beside me the last few yards across the yard and to be vocal as I didn’t open the as quickly as he’d have liked.

1 comment.

Wisdom And Youth

Posted on September 5th, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, Humor.

A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. Their insight may surprise you.

Better to be safe than………………..Punch a 5th grader
Strike while the …………………….Bug is close
It’s always darkest before…………… Daylight Savings Time
Never underestimate the power of……….Termites
You can lead a horse to water but……..how?
Don’t bite the hand that…………….. looks dirty
No news is…………………………..impossible
A miss is as good as a……………….Mr.
You can’t teach an old dog new…………math
If you lie down with dogs, you’ll………stink in the morning
Love all, trust……………………..me
The pen is mightier than the…………..pigs
An idle mind is……………………..The best way to relax
Where there’s smoke there’s……………pollution
Happy the bride who…………………..gets all the presents
A penny saved is……………………..not much
Two’s company, three’s………………..the Musketeers
Don’t put off till tomorrow what……….you put on to go to bed
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and…….you have to blow your nose.
None are so blind as………………….Stevie Wonder
Children should be seen and not………..spanked or grounded
If at first you don’t succeed………….get new batteries
You get out of something what you………see pictured on the box
When the blind leadeth the blind……….get out of the way

And the favorite:

Better late than…………………….pregnant.

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Observations From The Armchair

Posted on September 4th, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, Soap Box.

Earlier tonight, I was switching channels and watched a bit of the Republican National Convention on Faux News. What I found interesting in this convention in the year 2008 is the amount of ‘homemade posters’. Sure, back in ‘76 I’m sure that making a poster with a large poster board and some paint made sense. I just checked the calender and it is indeed 2008, and some of the things that’s changed since the ’70’s is that computers are in wide use now, photoshop is widely available and printing options are wide and varied. Next, let’s consider that the people at the convention didn’t just wake up, order a ticket to the convention and run down there in a matter of hours. No, there was much planning involved to get that many people together and each of the people had to plan. Did these people not have access to a freakin’ FedEx/Kinkos? The Kinkos down the street from me is open 24 hours and I have to drive past a couple of smaller ‘Mom ‘n’ Pop’ print shops which also have the ability to do some great signs at a variety of sized. Heck, it’s not all that hard to find a place to print out the vinyl and cover your car in a patriotic theme for the drive to the national convention. So why would someone go to the trouble of making a mess with paint and poster board to make an inferior sign? So the mindless masses at home will see the simple signs, and ‘feel’ the energy from the signs, for fear that a professional sign might come across and ‘too slick’ and manipulative - so a simple sign is able to actually manipulate by exploiting the lack of analytical skills of the masses. That’s how I see it from my arm chair… you view may differ - so go get yer own site.

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May The Best Candidate Win!

Posted on August 25th, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, You can't make this up..

I’m tired of the lobbyist for the RIAA and MPAA controlling arrogant fools like Biden, and now I’d llike to step in the ring and show them all what real character is.

2 comments.

Take A Look At Biden’s Pro-RIAA, Anti-Privacy Record

Posted on August 23rd, 2008 by William.
Categories: General.

For the entire CNet article, click HERE

I recommend that you follow the link above and read the entire article about Joe Biden’s voting record.

0 comments.

Joss Stone Reveals Her Views On Piracy

Posted on August 21st, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, Music.

For the original site, CLICK HERE

Here’s a video that starts in Spanish (?) and then the actual interview takes place in English. Joss Stone gives her views on piracy in music. I was ready to run out and pick up some Joss Stone discs, but after checking with RIAA Radar, it seems that her discs are released by a member of the RIAA. I guess the next best thing is to get a used copy, so I can have an original disc, and none of my money will go directly to the RIAA.

0 comments.

Best of Craigslist - Ferocious Attack Kitten

Posted on August 19th, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, Humor, You can't make this up..

Here’s another classic from The Best of Craigslist:

Ferocious Attack Kitten
Ferocious attack kitten is available for adoption to any home willing to accept him.

This destructive kitty has been trained as a proud warrior and will fiercely defend your house, even against you. Well-trained since 10-weeks of age to attack anything in his presence, he will protect your family from evil things, including the following:

* insects

* other trained attack kittens

* babies

* toilet paper

* anything under a blanket

* unwanted house guests
* paper bags

* floor rugs

* Chuck Norris

* Feet.

Great with children (assuming you don’t like the children). Probably best used for professional catfighting. He is housebroken, but only because he wants to be. This attack cat has trained himself to seek out his food anywhere you hide it and rip the bag open to feed himself, great for those who travel extensively. Also trained to drink water out of toilet bowls and dishwater from items in the sink. Knows how to open some doors. He will find you wherever you hide.

Neutered (trust me, you wont want to him to procreate). Has not been declawed, but you’ll figure that out really fast.

Understands and responds to a variety of vulgar and profane verbal commands. Has a very soft and furry belly, like a teddy bear - however he will bite your face if you try to touch it.

Willing to accept trades. Potential adopters must have experience with trained attack-kittens… please be prepared to show scars.

For the love of God, someone please take this thing out of my house.

0 comments.

Best of Craigslist - To The Minotaur That Lives Above Me

Posted on August 16th, 2008 by William.
Categories: General, Humor, You can't make this up..

For the Best of Craigslist, click HERE

There is a rare delight is searching through Craigslist.org for intresting, items off the beaten path and just plain odd goodies. In case you’d like to just go to the stand out entries, go to The Best of Craigslist.  Here’s an outstanding example:

To the Minotaur that lives above me.

First off, I must say that I admire your courage. It must be hard living in the world today as a lady-beast. Society judges, oh lord do they ever.

With that said, let’s get down to business. Over the past year, we’ve had a funny sort of relationship, you and I. When I first moved into the place, it was rather peaceful. It was an exciting time in my life, as it was the first time I would be living by myself. Then came the day that I first heard it. What did I hear you ask? It was sound of your hooves galloping across the hardwood floors of your living room. At the time I thought, “No big deal, surely it can’t always be like this.” Oh was I wrong. It turned out that every time I was at home, you would be up there, stomping around, like the wild lady-beast that you are.

After a few weeks, I determined through a process of elimination, that you are in fact, a Minotaur. It only makes sense.

FACT. Minotaurs have hooves, and that’s sure as hell what it sounds like is hitting the floor when you gallop around.

FACT. A Minotaur posses great strength, the kind of strength that can be felt by a guy laying on his couch, trying to get into a good book. The kind of strength that shakes the dishes in his cupboards. The kind of strength that can wake a guy out of a dead sleep, EVERY FRICKIN MORNING. I didn’t even need to set an alarm clock to wake up in the morning. Instead I wake up to THUMP THUMP THUMP. THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP. THUMP THUMP THUMP. I’m not a light sleeper by any means; I sleep right through the viscously loud police, fire truck, and ambulance sirens every night. I was lying there one morning, frustrated, counting the trips you took between your bedroom and your bathroom. 17. 17 god forsaken trips between the bedroom and the bathroom. Really? Are you kidding me? What could you possibly be doing?

FACT. Minotaurs are half bull. Bulls are aggressive when taunted. Apparently, the time I went upstairs, politely introduced myself, and asked you rather nicely to please quit stomping around, was a taunt. That’s when you got aggressive. You called the landlord and told him that I was complaining about your noise. When he told me about this, he said his response to your complaint was, “Quit making so much noise then.” Brilliant. Go Mr. Landlord! I tried keeping him out of this, but you felt it important to drag him into it.

After a few more weeks of you recklessly stomping around, I made another attempt at a civil confrontation. It failed. It failed because you stomped your way to the door, and you didn’t open it when you saw who was standing there. I know this because I heard your hooves clippity-clop their way to the door. Way to avoid confrontation.

To my surprise, the stomping ceased the next day, and I awoke to peace. “Amazing,” I thought, “It must be a midsummer miracle!!” A few days passed, and I ran into my landlord in the entry way. He mentioned that he received another angry phone call from you. Said that you felt threatened by my confrontations, said I scared you. Strange, since not once did I ever raise my voice or try to be anything but civil. He then mentioned that he told you to buy some slippers to wear around your apartment. Genius! It freakin worked!! Hell yea, Mr Landlord! High five!

Fast forward 11 months. The stomping has returned. No doubt in my mind the hooves have worn through the delicate fabrics of the slippers and are now, once again, banging against your hardwood floors.

Please, for the love of sweet baby jesus, run down to the local Target and purchase yourself another pair of hoof mufflers. I know you can run with those strong legs of yours, probably real fast like! Target downtown is all of 10 blocks away. Go Minotaur, go! Overcome the odds, society is watching! (and judging)

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